The 5 Best Books About Emotional Eating
Written by Isabel Vasquez, RD, LDN
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These days, emotional eating is all over the media. Diet culture has portrayed it as something shameful and to avoid when in reality, we eat for many reasons, one reason being our emotions!
As we addressed in another blog post, ‘Which Type of “Hungry” Are You?’, emotional hunger is a completely valid type of hunger within intuitive eating.
But have you ever worried that food has become your primary method of coping with your emotions?
Are you confused by different messages you’ve seen about emotional eating?
Do you feel completely unaware of if and when you’re eating emotionally?
There are a few books out there that explain and explore emotional eating. They can help you get a better grasp on the concept and become aware of if and how it’s present in your life.
This blog post will help you understand what emotional eating is, whether it’s unhealthy, and the best books that address emotional eating.
What is emotional eating?
Emotional eating is simply when we eat based on emotions we are feeling; the emotions trigger us to eat.
We have probably ALL eaten emotionally before. Just think of the notion of “comfort food”. If we’re feeling down, sometimes we just want food that makes us feel good in that moment. It can bring us pleasure and comfort.
The idea of eating for comfort or pleasure has gotten such a bad rap, but if food wasn’t meant to invoke pleasure then wouldn’t it all taste the same?! We derive pleasure from food, just as we derive pleasure from various other sources (movement, socialization, touch, etc).
There’s another issue with how emotional eating is addressed in the media, which Evelyn Tribole, MS, RDN, CEDRD-S and Elyse Resch, MS, RDN, CEDRD-S, FAND address in their book, Intuitive Eating. They say:
“What many folks have labeled as emotional eating is merely a psychological and biological consequence of food restriction. It’s important to heal the deprivation effects of food, which have both psychological and biological consequences.”
Therefore, if you have been dieting for a while, don’t be so quick to label your eating as emotional. It may simply be your body replenishing itself after a period of restriction, whether that restriction be physical restriction or a restrictive mindset.
It can be hard to accept this if you have a weight loss goal. However, research has demonstrated that diets simply don’t work and don’t result in sustainable weight loss. Not just that, but dieting is a risk factor for developing an eating disorder, especially those with binge eating behaviors.
That’s because binge eating is typically driven by restriction (learn more by reading our binge-restrict cycle blog). There can certainly be an emotional component as well; however, tending to the restriction is the first step towards developing a healthier relationship with food.
Recognizing whether your eating is emotional or your body’s natural response to restriction will require self-awareness and mindfulness. It may even take the input of a registered dietitian who can assess your energy intake and dieting history.
What emotions commonly cause emotional eating?
Certain emotions are more likely to trigger your urge to eat. A few of the most common ones are boredom, loneliness, and sadness. Food can serve as a distractor from these emotions. On the other hand, emotions like anxiety may decrease your appetite (although for some people, it does the opposite).
Eating out of boredom
Eating can absolutely be something to do if we are bored. It keeps us occupied if we don’t know what else to do or we just can’t find something engaging. It can help break up a monotonous routine and give you some stimulation.
Watching TV for a few hours? A trip to the kitchen to grab a snack can break up the time spent sitting on the couch.
Eating to counter loneliness
I think we can all agree that loneliness is not a fun feeling. And not only is it no fun, it is linked with various health conditions including premature death, dementia, and depression. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), immigrant and LGBTQIA+ communities are more likely to experience loneliness.
For a lot of people, eating can distract from that loneliness. Maybe we eat food that brings us comfort like our abuela’s signature mangu or our titi’s flan. It might help us feel connected to loved ones we haven’t seen in a while.
Maybe we eat to numb that loneliness by focusing on the food and maybe even uncomfortable fullness that results.
The opposite might also be true. When lonely, we may deprive ourselves of food in order to focus on physical hunger instead of on the loneliness (or emotional hunger) that is surfacing.
Eating when you’re feeling sad
Food brings us pleasure, so it could distract us from sadness. You know the classic breakup scene in movies where someone’s sitting on the couch watching a rom com, crying and eating a pint of ice cream? I’m sure many of us have reenacted that scene in real life!
Additionally, if we are enjoying what we’re eating, the idea of that experience ending may bring up sadness. We might continue eating past comfortable fullness to extend that pleasurable experience.
Eating more or less due to anxiety
When we feel anxiety or just a general overload of emotions, we may be less inclined to eat. That overwhelming rush of emotion may override our sense of appetite, preventing us from fueling properly.
Think of when someone is grieving a loss. People commonly provide them with food because that likely isn’t something they are prioritizing within their own life during that stressful time. Eating can go to the backburner when we are feeling anxious or depressed.
Is emotional eating unhealthy?
Despite diet culture’s demonization of it as something to be ashamed of, emotional eating is not inherently unhealthy. When it is just one of a bunch of coping skills you have to tend to your emotions, there is probably nothing to be concerned about.
It can also signal to us that there are emotions within us to explore and tend to.
When exploring your own use of eating as a way to cope with emotions, it is important to approach this exploration non-judgmentally.
Even if you are frequently using food as a means of coping with your emotions, acknowledge that it has served a purpose and you are not morally lesser than for doing this.
It is simply something to observe and an opportunity to better care for yourself as uncomfortable emotions surface in the future. You are learning about yourself!
Books about emotional eating
Here are a few books we recommend to learn more about emotional eating:
Anti-Diet by Christy Harrison
This book is jam-packed with content on diet culture from an experienced registered dietitian including its origins, how it harms us, and how we can break free from it with intuitive eating! Emotional eating is inevitably one of the topics Christy Harrison addresses in the book.
Hunger by Roxane Gay
Roxane Gay is one my absolute favorite authors and her memoir, Hunger, does not disappoint. In this book, she talks about her experience living as a fat black woman, how her relationship with food and her body has been impacted by trauma she faced as a child, and how her body has impacted how she is perceived in the world. She shares how food became a coping mechanism to handle her trauma.
Intuitive Eating by Evelyn Tribole and Elyse Resch
Of course, Intuitive Eating has to be included on this list! This is the book that brought intuitive eating into the world, and the 4th edition was just released in 2020!
In this book, the authors (aka the founder of intuitive eating) write in-depth about all 10 principles of intuitive eating, along with other important content and context for intuitive eating. It has a whole chapter dedicated to emotional eating.
Decolonizing Wellness: A Qtbipoc-Centered Guide to Escape the Diet Trap, Heal Your Self-Image, and Achieve Body Liberation by Dalia Kinsey
A common critique of intuitive eating is that it lacks an important social justice lens. That’s where books like this one are extremely valuable. In this book, Dalia Kinsey brings a different perspective to the conversation.
Dalia, a registered dietitian, approaches body positivity and food freedom from a queer, BIPOC lens, addressing all the unique factors that impact these marginalized communities’ relationships with food and their bodies.
Unapologetic Eating: Make Peace with Food and Transform Your Life by Alissa Rumsey
Alissa Rumsey is an intuitive eating registered dietitian whose book, Unapologetic Eating, came out in 2021. In it, she provides a four-step approach geared towards women to help them break free from diets. One of these steps is feeling, where she helps you tend to yourself emotionally. The book also includes prompts and exercises to help you explore the concepts for yourself.
Final Thoughts
Diet culture may make you feel like you need to stop emotional eating in its tracks, but emotional eating is not inherently bad. Reading emotional eating books can help you explore your relationship to food in a nonjudgmental, curious way and work towards better physical, emotional, and mental health.
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What Are The Four Types Of Hunger In Intuitive Eating?